Carrie wasn't too happy about it. I don't know why, as tights aren't very expensive. Certainly she could buy some more. Or were they some rare tights that are difficult to find? Anyway, the theater director had everybody start searching for them in the changing and costume rooms. Naturally, they weren't found.
Later, I went back to the tree and untied the tights. I figured that maybe I should return them, but by this point they were starting to get a little smelly, like mold. Probably from getting wet and hanging in the wild. I should wash them first. I stuffed the tights into the brown paper bag I brought, then went up to the theater building rest room. Using some hand soap, I washed the tights in the sink, rinsed them, and wrung them out. Finally, I found a moment to sneak into the costuming room, then hung the tights on a hangar, wedged between a couple of clothes. They'd probably dry by the next day and could then be "found"...
I don't know why I went to all this trouble. I could easily keep the tights. Nobody would suspect me. And I could take them home. I tried to put it out of my mind for a while.
The next day, I changed my mind. I decided I was going to keep the tights. So, I hightailed it back to the theater building first thing in the morning and slipped into the costuming room. But... they were GONE. What the hell happened? It was just one evening. I checked the floor in case they slipped off, but no luck. As I left the room, I spotted Carrie talking to the theater director. In her hands, there was something brown rolled up. Yep... she got them. Damned it all! Once again, I tripped myself up, and lost another opportunity to have my own tights that fit.
It wasn't till I was in my 30's that I truly had my very own tights, instead of borrowing. Strange when you think about how long it took
ReplyDeleteWow, until your 30's!! Had you thought about it but was too fearful of being judged by a saleswoman?
ReplyDeleteMy first way of mitigating the fear was buying dance tights. Because boys wear tights for ballet, it wouldn't be too weird for me to be buying them (I looked athletic enough to possibly pass as a boy who studied ballet). My next big leap was buying a unitard. Thankfully they were unisex, so it wasn't like I was buying ladies tights. It wasn't until I was 29 that I first bought women's tights in a department store. I knew intellectually that it easily be the case of my buying them for a girlfriend, but knowing that it really wasn't the case made it stressful and... kind of a thrill.
Yes, part of it was the fear of being judged by the cashier when checking out. The other fear was being caught by my wife at the time, she is now the ex-wife. Anyway I had admitted to her early in our marriage that I loved to wear tights and she became very upset and couldn't handle it. She took it to the extreme and thought it meant I was either gay or that I did not find her sexually thrilling enough to be it. We could never find a happy medium, for her it was nothing at all. So my fetish went underground and initially I would just borrow hers.
ReplyDeleteAs time went on, I wanted my own tights and eventually devised decent hiding places in the house that she would never find. I was probably 30 when I finally found the courage to buy some tights at a Target store. The first time it literally took an hour wandering the store, going down the tights aisle and then walking away, checking to see who noticed, until I finally screwed up the courage to buy some underwear, tshirts, and tights. I kept telling myself that it was probable for a husband to buy items for his wife, yet was so worried if the cashier would say anything. I must admit my heart was racing and had a slight hard on from the thrill. I rushed home to an empty house to try on my very own pair of tights which was a fantastic feeling!
I always wonder about what goes on in the mind of a woman who is so disturbed by her man enjoying an article of women's clothing, to the point where it is irreconcilable. If he professes heterosexuality and the sex life has been very good, then what's she to really fear? Each person has their own psychology. Maybe there was some baggage about emasculation that gnawed at her, like a Dad who was pussy-whipped by Mom. She'd have to have a man who has no effeminate side.
DeleteYeah, the hiding place is a challenge. I once had a girlfriend who decided to straighten up my closet (she was a neat freak) when I wasn't there. I guess as a friendly surprise of "hey I straightened out your messy closet!" Well, she found my tights cache. When she showed me her handiwork, I immediately knew that she must've found them. And that's when she picked up a box she had labeled tights/leotards and said "I wasn't sure about what to do with these..." Awkward. Well, I told her I wore them under trousers on cold days, as a kind of low bulk thermal underwear. She looked at me funny and just said "OK..." and that was it. She didn't question any further. There's more, but I'll get to that later in the blog. ;-)
I will never know completely as the argument was always the same with neither of us budging. Up until that point the sex was good, but after it was never the same. I could profess all I wanted and when we did have sex she would comment that it was great and we should do it more often. BUT yet there was something else, in hindsight she may have been cheating with her married boss. After we divorced I found out that she was sleeping with him and she stated it didn't start till after the divorce. Frankly I don't give a damn anymore about that or her. In the end, after one door closed another opened and I found my sweet new wife who does let me wear tights with her. So perhaps the grand plan was for me to find her instead ;-)
DeleteWhile I was divorced, my tights cache exploded. Hiding was less of an issue but I still had a cleaning lady come in every two weeks and I couldn't let her find my cache. My own place, yet I still had to hide but at least this time I just used a big suitcase and locked it. It would have been awkward to have found.
Funny, when I did broach the subject of tights with my gf/now 2nd wife I used the thermal underwear excuse too. I was up North and she was down South when she called and said she couldn't believe I would be experiencing -10 degrees windchill. I told her since I didn't have any thermal underwear, I might have to resort to my last options to keep my legs warm. I held my breath as we started to talk knowing I was going to mention tights and gauge her reaction. Well I had her curious, so she asked what were my last options and I said I might have to resort to wearing gray tights under my pants to stay warm. She said hmmmm and the conversation moved on. Luckily she didn't ask where I had gotten the tights. The next morning I did indeed wear my gray tights to work to stay warm while walking there. During my commute, she asked how cold it was and did the "options" feel good? My heart leaped with joy as it looked like she might be OK with it. Received several more texts thru out the day asking if my options felt good and her last text sent me soaring when she asked if I wanted to borrow her bodystocking. That sealed the deal for me. We had already professed love for each other and this put her into the next category - fiancee...
Looking forward to reading more about your clean closet later...
Jamie that's so terrific to hear. What a good straight forward way to ease into the idea. Really amazing that she leaped that far forward to suggest you might want to borrow her bodystocking. Yes moving on from your 1st wife was definitely the right thing.
DeleteI do sometimes wonder if we desire something strongly enough that it somehow works on the "karma" and helps bring satisfaction. There's one guy floating a few videos around where he and his wife are dressed about the same--hose, heels, skirt--and she appears to have no reservations about embracing him. Such a connection must be so incredibly satisfying physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Okay. After you took the time to read and comment on my blog, I decided to take a look at yours. The result, you've got a new "Follower". I wish I had the time to read more at this point. I'll return and read more this coming weekend.
ReplyDeleteI do have a question about the mechanics of your blog. It looks as if your blog has a "Reply" button after each comment which allows you to reply to each comment directly. My blog doesn't seem to have this. Can you tell me how the reply button is added? You made several comments on my blog and I'd like to be able to reply directly to your comments.
Hi sh2wph, thanks for following. :-)
DeleteThis is my first BlogSpot account, so I took most of the defaults. I don't know why yours is not showing a reply directly below a given user comment, so you can reply in-line to that instead of the whole thread. In the settings for comment, do you have "Embedded" selected? Is "Registered User" selected for who can comment? I have moderation set, and you don't. Perhaps that makes a difference?